I was reading through Hebrews this morning and noted that in Chapters 3 and 4, God uses this phrase 3 times:  “Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts.”  The first time I read it in Hebrews 3:8, I paused and asked God “is my heart hard”?  Perhaps it was too little coffee or too much pride, but I didn’t hear anything and kept reading.  Then, I saw the phrase 2 more times and thought “ok, God.  What is it that you want me to consider?”  Below are 4 things that I confessed as hard-hearted.  I’ve included a “COACHING QUESTION” after each to help you process your heart as well.

1.  DISTRACTIONS– my pace, my technology and my distractions have made me “hard of hearing” with my Father’s voice.  He’s always speaking, but my self-importance to keep rushing, producing and numbing myself with work, tv and social media have created a wedge between God and I.  I must confess this wedge and unplug from things each day to focus only on Him. COACHING QUESTION:  What are the distractions in your life?  Are you using them to numb something that can lead to a hardened heart?  What are you numbing out?

2.  PRIDE – Unless something in my life becomes desperate (hurting child, impossible marriage situation, illness), I can subconsciously lull myself into handling all things in my own strength.  Relationships, leadership and ministry become areas that I draw from past experiences and rely on myself rather than allow the Lord into every nook and cranny of my need.  COACHING QUESTION:  Make note of all situations that you are leading “in your own strength”.  What are the areas of your life you need fresh wind from the Holy Spirit?

3.  LACK OF PASSION– Life becomes routine.  I don’t get depressed, but I get comfortable, cynical or detached.  This is not something outsiders can easily pick up on.  I scrub up pretty well from the outside looking in, but my spark is dimming.  I need to ask God to give me His heart and vision for the things in my life.  COACHING QUESTION:  Can you name one or more areas in your life you are simply going through the motions?  Ponder the word “detached”.  What parts of your life have you developed a numbing detachment from?

4.  LACK OF COMPASSION – The world can make me cynical.  Our broken world is filled with messy people (of which I am the messiest) and messy situations.  I know my heart is hardening when I am void of emotion.  Does my heart still break for people and situations?  COACHING QUESTION:  When was the last time you cried?  When was the last time you laughed until it hurt?  What is one thing that is breaking your heart like it breaks God’s heart?

Let’s take the answers to the questions above as God-given awareness to the things He wants to work on in our lives.  What are the things God has revealed about your heart?  Please share with me below.


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  1. Over commitment with working multiple jobs to be able to pay college bills as a single mom with no help is for a great cause but it leaves no time for anything else including being lonely. While it is all for a good cause, I’m starting to realize that it does lead to that DIY mentality and leaves no time to feel anything other than overwhelmed with no apparent way to get out of the revolving door!

    1. Teresa, thanks for your honest processing. Your revolving door sounds like a treadmill. I pray the Lord will help our “DIY” mentality to let HIM do it for us. Pausing to pray for you. The Lord is pleased by the focus on your heart and your unselfish willingness to embrace this season for your kids’ college.

  2. Oh my! Number 3 especially took hold of me today. Becoming ‘detached’ is my defense mechanism. Thank you for sharing. This lesson will be my focus for the week- headed to Hebrews right now!

    1. Thanks for your authentic processing, Kristine. I thought detached was a perfect way to describe my response, but wasn’t sure anyone else would “get it”. If you’re headed to Hebrews, I know your heart will remain soft. God’s word always softens my heart. Thanks for stopping by my blog today.

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